Tuesday, January 15, 2013

The Honeymoon Period - Fact or Fiction?

This post was inspired by Karla over at Forever Newly Wedded.  As I was catching up on some blog reading today, I read her post about how incredibly lucky she feels to have found her husband and that he chose her.  I feel the same way and a lot of times it's attributed to the fact that I'm a newlywed.

In fact, just yesterday someone asked me how married life is and I responded with "it's amazing".  She laughed and said "Awww that's cute.  You're still in the honeymoon phase."  I know that it's a common joke about marriage - you're only happy as a newlywed, in the honeymoon period but I have to say that I find this statement a little pessimistic and also a little insulting, as if the only reason I'm happy with my marriage is because I'm a newlywed.  I know the person who said it didn't mean it in that way but it really got me thinking.

Now, I'm no marriage expert.  I haven't been married for a decade or even a year.  I haven't celebrated a silver anniversary or a golden anniversary.  But I have been with my husband for six years and we've been incredibly happy for that entire period.  It's because we take marriage seriously and not as something that can be terminated when something goes wrong (coughKimKardashiancough).  We put our relationship as a top priority in our lives.  We don't scream at each other or let ourselves get irritated by the little things. We treat each other with respect always.  We think about each other's feelings.  We talk through our problems.  We learn from our mistakes and we don't let them happen a second time.

I'm not happy with my husband because I'm a newlywed, because if I really look at our lives, nothing except my last name changed when we got married. Our living situation is the same.  We have the same dogs, jobs, cars.  If anything, our lives have gotten more difficult since our wedding with the Sandy Hook shooting and the fact that Jeremie just started back to school for his masters.  I'm not happy because I'm a newlywed.

I'm happy because my husband is my best friend and because of all the reasons I already gave.  I am incredibly lucky to have him in my life and I am so lucky he chose me.  Like Karla, I'm not sure how I got so lucky but I hope I never forget it or take it for granted.

I hope when I ask someone how married life is they say it's awesome just so I can respond with "I totally agree!"


  1. SO true. Very glad someone else agrees with me on the "honeymoon stage" thing. You guys are adorable. Love it! =D